I lost my family exactly one year ago next month - not to death. However, it feels the same way and just as bad. It is scary to think that all of your life you think you have a loving, caring family - bound by unseen arms of unconditional love. Then, in an instant, some hateful words exchanged, and 'poof' they are gone. I have spent the last year trying to 'deal' with this. I have prayed every night to my g'ma in Heaven that she would put love back into the hearts of my family for me, but to no avail. I kept thinking "Some day the damage done will fade and love will prevail". Now in the face of serious illness, I went to them again and asked for money to help me see a doctor who may give me options of what to do. All I have received is excuses and the occasional "I'm on the phone and will call you back" with, of course, no call back - no letter - no e-mail.........nothing. Just silence. Silence is actually louder than words of hate in a crisis. So, now, again, I feel like 'nothing'. I feel numb and that I am going through this loss all over again. So, I have come to realize that sometimes you have to cut people out of your life............backspace.........deleted. It is hard to lose your family, especially when they are still alive. I feel I have been thrown away - like a used tissue. I just wanted to share with all of you, however, these wonderful words I found that I feel EVERYONE should hear:
**Many people will walk in and out of your life, but only true friends will leave footprints on your heart. To handle yourself, use your head; to handle others, use your heart. Anger is only one letter short of danger. If someone betrays you once, it is his fault; if he betrays you twice, it is your fault. Great minds discuss ideas; average minds discuss events; small minds discuss people. He who loses money, loses much; he who loses a friend, loses much more; he who loses faith, loses ALL. Beautiful young people are accidents of nature, but beautiful old people are works of art. Learn from the mistakes of others. You can't live long enough to make them all yourself..
There is no beginning or end. Yesterday is history. Tomorrow is mystery. Today is a gift, that's why they call it the present.** (unknown)
Love one another, love your friends, love your family, be good to yourself and be true to your heart. Listen to your head. Keep on the right track, look both ways before crossing the street and, above all, don't lose faith.
Love from your 'sugar' friend Blondeyy
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I am sorry that you have lost your entire family. It is terrible to think that one can suffer such a loss over anything. Indeed I fought with my father for years, but he never stopped loving me, even when we didn't approve of each other. I'd love to hear what momentous issue could have split you apart.
1Without attempting to minimize the significance of your pain, I have found that illness of a serious kind often focuses not only the mind but the entire soul at what is important. In an age where we extol the 'me' it often leaves very little time for God. Many of us find that we have left him at home when we go to work and still others only visit at the end of the week.
There is a wonderful little book of which I am very fond called, The Practice of the Presence of God. It was written a long time ago by Brother Lawrence and it is a very simple book, one about daily life and how to invite Him to be with you. I try and read it once a year. The language is somewhat difficult for some but the message is wonderfully illuminating. It opens our hearts to the ways in which we may not want to work, but in the ways in which he DOES work.
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